Everywhere you go, everyone has advice and theories as to the best places to meet someone new.
“Do your grocery shopping between 6:00 and 8:00 pm because that’s when singles are
“Go to your local bar on a Friday night and take a stool at the bar next to an empty stool.”
“Visit the bookstore and browse the Self-Help section, and maybe someone else will come by who’s also looking in that section.”
We’re told if we’re newly single, we should go here. If we’re over 35, we should go there. We should go to this club on that night; join this Meet Up; log on to that site.
But the truth is, that wherever you live and whatever your circumstance or your age, there is one place in your town, and one place only, that stands out as the best place to meet someone new.
And that one place is called (drum roll, please!):
And where is Anywhere? It’s that place that can be found down at the intersection of Here and Now!
This is important because it means that you’re going to have to be open to new possibilities all day long!
Because the Great Truth of single life is this:
You never know when you’re going to run into somebody from your future.
You can go do your grocery shopping, and go to the meet up or bar or dance, but if you’re all focused on getting there and doing that, you could pass your “possible future” right by, on the way there…or back!
As the great philosopher John Lennon once said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”
So as of today, starting right now, you should do what I tell my date coaching clients to do: Become a member of the AAA Club. No, not the road repair service. I mean: Adopt the Anywhere Attitude!
Case in point: A client of mine we’ll call Linda, a successful advertising career woman in her late 30s. One day she came into my office totally fed up with being single: She’d been single most of her adult life, in and out of various relationships that didn’t last very long, and now she’d had it and demanded I solve the problem. So I had her declare allegiance to AAA for a month.
For the next 30 days, Linda became a full time member. She started conversations with her doorman, with the guy in the deli, with people at the bus stop. In short, everyone she came in contact with. And these were not all goal-oriented interactions focused on flirting and attracting someone. Often it was just polite conversation. And not just with men, either. As she explained to me, “I never know who that woman I’m talking to may know!” She simply spoke to everyone around her with the attitude that the possibility of finding someone could exist anywhere.
Then, one of the people she spoke to turned out to be a cab driver who had a brother in real estate. She met him, dated him, and married him.
BTW: Linda is 6’1”, and weighs 265 pounds. But she didn’t let that stop her.
If she can do it, you can do it.
So learn to see every moment as an opportunity. Wherever you go, go as a member of AAA, because you never know when you’re going to run into somebody from your future.